Healthy Eating for Kids: A Pediatric Dietitian's Guide to Raising Confident Eaters

Establishing healthy eating habits early in life lays the foundation for a lifetime of well-being—and it starts at home.

Dana Dose, a registered dietitian and pediatric nutrition specialist, is passionate about helping families create positive food environments from the very beginning. She believes that raising healthy eaters isn't about perfection. It's about taking small, intentional steps that foster connection, confidence, and joy around food.

Whether you're introducing solids, navigating picky eating, or simply trying to make mealtimes less stressful, read on for Dana's expert insights and practical strategies to help families build a healthy relationship with food—one meal at a time.

How Eating Differs for Children vs. Adults

While adults often have figured out eating patterns that work for them—whether it's following something like the Mediterranean diet or simply eating three balanced meals a day—children's nutritional needs and eating habits are fundamentally different. Understanding these differences is crucial for parents and caregivers to support their child's growth and development effectively.

1. Higher Carbohydrate Needs

Children's bodies require significantly more carbohydrates proportionally than adults to fuel their rapid growth and high energy levels. While adults may focus on protein or healthy fats, children naturally gravitate toward carbs—and that's completely normal. "I hear a lot of parents worry about how their child is drawn to carbs," Dana explains. "But that's not a bad thing. It's actually what children need more of compared to adults." Parents should embrace this need by offering nutrient-rich carbohydrate sources like fruits, whole grains, and starchy vegetables.

2. Frequently Offering Food is Essential

Unlike adults, who can often go 4-6 hours between meals, children need food offered every 2-3 hours. "Kids burn through energy so fast," says Dana. "We should be offering them food more often to match their needs. It's just part of their metabolism."

Even if children don't seem hungry or decide not to eat, it's still important to offer food regularly. "Sometimes kids won't eat what's offered, and that's okay," Dana explains. "The key is to provide consistent opportunities to eat so they can listen to their bodies and eat when they're ready." Skipping these opportunities can lead to irritability, fatigue, or even nutrient deficiencies over time.

3. Focus on Weekly Intake, Not Daily

Children's eating patterns can vary widely from day to day. They might barely eat one day and consume a surprising amount the next. This is completely normal. "It's better to look at how much your child is eating over the course of a week rather than stressing about daily intake," Dana advises. "Kids don't eat the same way adults do, and their hunger levels fluctuate a lot more."

4. Nighttime Snacks Can Be Beneficial

While adults are often advised to avoid eating close to bedtime, the opposite can be true for children. A small, balanced snack before bed can help support kids' nutritional needs and might help them sleep better. "Eating before bed is often really helpful for kids," Dana says. "It's not like adults, where it might disrupt sleep. Kids' bodies actually benefit from a nighttime snack in many cases."

By recognizing these differences, parents can better support their unique nutritional needs. As Dana puts it, "Children aren't tiny adults. Their bodies and metabolisms work differently, and we need to honor that by providing them with the right structure and flexibility to grow and thrive."

Introducing Solid Foods

Your child's relationship with food starts with an important milestone: introducing solids.

While exciting, it can also feel overwhelming for parents trying to decide on the best approach. Dana highlights three methods for introducing solids:

Baby-led weaning: Offering finger foods from the very beginning, allowing babies to feed themselves.
Pureed introduction: Starting with spoon-fed purees and gradually progressing to more textured foods.
Combination approach: A mix of baby-led weaning and pureed introduction, offering flexibility based on the child and family's needs.

Choosing the right method depends on several factors, including:

Parent comfort level: If parents feel very anxious about finger foods and choking, starting with purees may feel more manageable.
Child's readiness: Developmental milestones, like sitting up unassisted and showing interest in food, play a key role.
Practical constraints: Factors like daycare policies or available food options (e.g., WIC-provided purees) may influence the choice.

Dana emphasizes that there's no "one-size-fits-all" solution and debunks the myth that combining approaches will confuse babies. "Parents often think they have to pick one method and stick with it, but that's not true," she explains. "You can adapt your approach based on what works for your family without causing any confusion for your baby."

For parents unsure where to start, Dana offers a helpful resource: the Starting Solids Decision Guide, which outlines these approaches and helps families determine the best fit for their situation.

Division of Responsibility in Feeding

One of the most effective ways to raise healthy, confident eaters is by following the Division of Responsibility in feeding, a concept developed by feeding expert Ellyn Satter. This approach clearly defines the roles of parents and children during mealtimes, creating a structure that fosters independence and reduces stress.

Parents Decide: What, When, and Where

Parents are responsible for deciding what food is offered, when meals and snacks are served, and where eating takes place. "Parents set the boundaries and establish the structure around mealtimes," Dana explains. "This means providing balanced, nutritious options at regular intervals in a consistent setting, like the family table."

Children Decide: Whether and How Much to Eat

Once the food is offered, it's up to the child to decide whether they want to eat and how much they want to eat. This gives children the autonomy to listen to their hunger and fullness cues without external pressure. "It's not the parent's job to control how much their child eats," says Dana. "By letting kids take the lead on that part, we help them develop a healthy relationship with food and their own bodies."

Fostering Independence and Reducing Mealtime Stress

This clear division of roles reduces power struggles and stress at the table. "When parents try to control how much or what their child eats, it often leads to mealtime battles and anxiety for everyone," Dana shares. "But when parents stick to their role and let children stick to theirs, it creates a more peaceful, enjoyable environment where kids feel safe to explore food at their own pace." Over time, this approach builds children's confidence in their eating habits and encourages them to make positive food choices independently.

Addressing Picky Eating

Selective eating, often labeled as "picky eating," is a common concern for parents, and understanding its root causes can help in addressing the issue effectively. Picky eating is a developmentally normal stage that usually occurs in toddlerhood. The key is to get through it without disrupting everyone's positive experiences with food and in a way that both guides the child through growing out of it and allows for the child to continue to thrive and maintain nourishment.

Problematic picky eating is when their selectiveness is causing stress and struggles at the table and/or medical or growth problems. Dana emphasizes that problematic picky eating, also called "problem feeding," can stem from a variety of factors, and identifying the underlying cause is key to finding solutions.

Possible Causes of Problematic Picky Eating

Medical Issues: Conditions like pediatric feeding disorders, dental pain, or sensory sensitivities can make eating difficult or uncomfortable for children. Rarely, it may be linked to an eating disorder like ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder).
Mealtime Pressure or Stress: "If mealtimes are filled with pressure, kids can start associating eating with stress," Dana explains. This often creates a cycle where children eat less, leading to even more pressure from parents.
Parental Food History or Trauma: A parent's own experiences with food—whether it's a history of restrictive eating, trauma, or even an active eating disorder—can unintentionally impact their child's relationship with food.

Dietitians like Dana can work with you to investigate the underlying cause of your child's picky eating. For example, Dana often observes a family meal either in person or through a recorded video to help walk parents through specific strategies they can start incorporating.

Strategies to Address Non-Problematic Picky Eating

When there isn't an underlying medical issue, what can you do to address picky eating?

Remove Pressure from Mealtimes: Dana advises parents to let go of expectations at the table. "When parents pressure kids to eat, it often backfires and makes things worse," she says. Focus on creating a fun, low-pressure environment where children feel safe to explore food at their own pace.
Create Positive Food Experiences: Encourage fun, stress-free interactions with food, like involving kids in meal prep or offering new foods alongside familiar favorites. "Positive experiences help kids build confidence and curiosity about food," Dana notes.
Offer Familiar Foods Alongside New Foods: There's no need to be a short-order cook. Aim to offer one meal for everyone at the table. To ensure everyone gets a chance to refuel, always include at least one item that you know your selective eater is comfortable with.

For children with very selective diets, whether from problematic or non-problematic picky eating, Dana recommends evaluating for potential nutrient deficiencies. “If a child isn’t eating a balanced variety, we might need to consider supplements while addressing the underlying issues,” she explains.

Picky eating often takes time and patience to improve, but with the right strategies and a supportive approach, children can develop a more positive and adventurous relationship with food.

The Importance of Family Meals

Family meals are more than just a time to eat—they're an opportunity to connect, build healthy habits, and support overall well-being. Research shows that sharing at least 3-5 meals per week as a family can lead to significant mental and physical health benefits for both children and adults.

Benefits of Shared Meals

Regular family meals are linked to improved nutrition, better mental health, and stronger family bonds. "Mealtimes are about more than the food," Dana explains. "They're a chance to create positive associations with eating, reduce stress, and foster connection. When mealtimes are light and fun, everyone benefits."

Flexibility in Participation

Not every family member has to be present for every meal to see the benefits. "Even if it's just one parent and one child eating together, that connection matters," says Dana. Older siblings, grandparents, or other caregivers can also help create a supportive mealtime environment.

Starting Small and Building a Routine

For families who feel overwhelmed by the idea of frequent shared meals, Dana suggests starting small. "You don't have to overhaul your schedule overnight," she says. "Start with one meal a week and build from there. The key is consistency."

Role Modeling Healthy Eating Behaviors

Young children learn by watching the adults around them. "When parents and caregivers model balanced eating and show enjoyment at the table, kids pick up on those behaviors," Dana notes. This role modeling helps children develop a positive relationship with food and encourages them to try new things over time.

Family meals don't have to be elaborate or perfect—what matters most is creating a space for connection and joy around food. Even small efforts can make a big difference in raising healthy, confident eaters.

Dana Dose, The Family Nutrition Pro, is fueled by her vision to help all families eat meals together more often. She supports parents on their journey to stress-free and nutritious family meals. Find out more about her services and book a visit at https://thefamilynutritionpro.com. Dana is a Registered Dietitian and Board Certified Specialist in Pediatric Nutrition. You can find her on Facebook and Instagram @thefamilynutritionpro.